Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
