I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Randomize
