So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
