So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I'm passing your future prison.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
