I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
We're too hungover to prance.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
