i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
