I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
