somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
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