you turned your livingroom into a bong?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
