i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
