so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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