Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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