Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize