ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize
