Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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