you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
