At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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