If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
