On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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