no. you can't hotbox the world.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
