We're like a lot better than the average bears
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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