Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize
