Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
