well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize