You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
