Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
