Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
