i just wanna soil my oats bro
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
