Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
