Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
