Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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