how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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