But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
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