So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize