dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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