Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
