I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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