No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Randomize
