in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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