wat bout pragnant strippers??
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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