Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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