woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
