i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize
