Me too!
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I think i got beer on your cat.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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