Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Randomize