at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize