Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
