so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
