I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
