i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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